It’s not so much that she’s wearing a ridiculous sweater, it’s that a ridiculous sweater seems to be wearing her. Could it be that it’s actually a sentient being using her as a host? Is this poor woman merely a vessel of nutrients, a superhighway of vascular goodness for a woolly parasite? She does seem to be trying to get our attention with a slightly panicked smile and some subtle hand gestures. The only plausible explanation is that her life[...]

Little Aynnie Rand saw no humor in the distasteful shenanigans of those three little pigs. Horrid, filthy, wasteful animals. A house made of straw? It makes no sense! Neither, however, does this sweater. Expanding bust pleats for a seven-year-old? A pair of drumsticks where arms should be?  No, this will not do. Objectively speaking, this is the worst. Sweater. Ever. *psssst

. . . and so, Bear-Proof Sweaters Inc. was forced to cease production and close it’s doors forever.

This sure looks like a fun way to get kids interested in voting. It really puts a happy face on the world of politics. Just goes to show you that donkeys and elephants actually can play together, they can even share a ball! Wrong! This is actually a subtle way to further divide the country. Note that one is knitted and one is crocheted. Go ahead and explain that when the people of this country take up arms against one[...]

These kids look just like the 1970s version of the future. Maybe this is what Logan was really running from.

Moments after regaining consciousness, confusion sets in. She wonders, with a grim suspicion of the truth, whether she showed up to the party wearing the blanket or if she just woke up that way. Unsure of which would be worse, her friends vow never to reveal what really happened.