Archives for April 2006

Balls of Solid Brass

Published on 30 Apr 2006 at 6:21 pm. 17 Comments.
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And I ain’t talkin’ ’bout no yarn. There’s no knitting content whatsoever in this post, as a matter of fact. OK, a little at the end.

It’s not often that a speaker at a White House sponsored event gives you tingles. Tingles of glee, of fear, of sweeping sadness at the state of our union, of nervous laughter, but most of all, tingles of “Oh no, he did not just say that! Ohhhh SNAP!”

Stephen Colbert gave a speech at the White House Correspondents Dinner last night. It appears that since he left both the president and the big-business press corps laying over an open flame on razor sharp kebob skewers – of comedy, you won’t hear much about it from regular news outlets. Do yourself a huge favor, watch it. I’ve never seen such nerve. I would most certainly have gone into full-on Jan Brady mode and run out of there crying, my hair swinging awkwardy behind me. But I’m sure he didn’t expect to leave there in good graces, so he made the most of what was a rather surprising invitation to speak. If you don’t watch his show on Comedy Central, Colbert used to be on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. He now has his own fake news show where his character is based on Bill O’Reilly. He obviously hates Bill O’Reilly. A lot.

Here is the story from the Daily Kos where I originally found the link to the video. I’m linking it because the commentary for the post is really interesting. If you don’t feel like downloading the video (but really, you must to get the full effect), you can read a transcript here. If you just want the link to the video, you can find it here at Democratic Underground. It’s chopped up into two pieces to make the download quicker.

Go ahead, watch it, I’ll wait . . .

~whistles tunelessly while everyone squinches uncomfortably in their seats as they watch a man in a suit tell GW what a huge disaster he is – to his face. Not to mention calling out the spinelessness of White House Press Correspondents.~

Now tell me, is there even enough yarn in the world to make this man a Wille Warmer? I think not. I Heart Stephen Colbert. Couldn’t you just picture a big vaudillian hook coming slowly into frame and yanking him out? It’s going to be a shame when he unexpectedly “retires to a remote village in Cuba” in the next couple of weeks.

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What is this strange, yarny object?

Published on 27 Apr 2006 at 12:20 am. 11 Comments.
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Well, well, well . . . what have we here? Could it be – knitting?? Holy cow, it is! It’s an actual finished object. Will wonders never cease? It’s Jon’s grandmother’s birthday scarf. (and before you ask, yes, I used it in the photo for the “Finished Object Gallery” button before it was actually finished. Whaddaya gonna do about it? Huh?! I’ve got a fork and I’m not afraid to use it!)

I used about three and a half skeins of Berger du Nord “Charmant” (that means “charming” in French, doncha know). I think I used size 8 needles. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I love the Clapotis pattern. It’s easy enough to memorize and dropping that stitch never gets old. And the finished object is the perfect showcase for yarn. I love the way the dropped bars look up close.

So lately, I’ve been trying to get back in to some semblance of a shape other than that of a BarbaMama. We’ve got a kick-ass treadmill in the basement. It’s not just some wobbly, squeaky hunk of junk that you hang your clothes on, you can actually run on this thing. And there are weights, a bench, and even a fitness ball that you sit on to do various exercises. I’ve been working out regularly for the past month, I even started the “Couch to 5k” running plan from Cool Running and have had weekly outings with Charlene and Kellee! I like that they leave the word “potato” out of the title. Sure, I’d rather slather myself with sour cream and bacon, but you can only do that for so long and frankly, I don’t need the constant reminder about my tatery goodness.

People often say that working out gives them energy. Vim and vigor, even. Yeah. I don’t have that. I’m tired all the time. And hurty. But it’s that good kind of hurty. I’m up to week three of the plan, and so far the pain and exhaustion and stinkiness seem to be worth it. I know working out works, I have the honeymoon capri pants to prove it. They haven’t seen daylight since the summer of 2003, but who knows, maybe this will be their big comeback year. It would help if the fine folks at Pepperidge Farm would quit making double-chocolate Milano cookies. Just sayin’.

Oh, also, my apologies to Amysue. I totally didn’t realize she spelled her name that way. I’ve been using the Waltonian spelling. I went and fixed it in the last post, too. Sorry about that!

 

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Whew!

Published on 22 Apr 2006 at 1:42 pm. 15 Comments.
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That was quite a move, but I’m happy with my new home. My favorite bit is the “Email Me” button. I can’t stop rolling my mouse over and over her. I’m very easily amused.

I feel like I’m starting this blog from scratch. It’s a second chance, of sorts. Maybe this is the year I make JenLa proud! This is going to be a crazy year, what with the whole book thing and a brand new blog to play with. I have a lot of fun ideas to spring on you, not the least of which is my plan to have you all crocheting cans with reckless abandon by the end of the summer. heh heh. I just finished my San Pellegrino soda can tote bag and brought it with me to the Yarn Harlot’s book signing last night. A few people seemed to really like it and said they actually might like to make one. The pattern will be up in a few days and I can’t recommend that soda enough. Very tasty, especially with a nip of gin. Plus, the cans themselves are really cute.

 

And speaking of the signing, what a blast! Stephanie was her usual hilarious self and gave a great talk before scribbling in all our books. The place was packed and since I got there with just a few minutes to spare, I didn’t have a whole lot of time to mingle before Stephanie got to it. I did get to talk to Monica, who continually knocks my socks off with her socks. We agreed that we were both resisting the urge to start quilting because it turns out that fabric stores are crack dens much in the same way that yarn stores are. But I think I may have convinced her to give needle felting a try. Despite all the bleeding, it really is fun! I also talked to some women who really liked my new tote bag, but I forgot to ask if they had blogs. If you’re one of those women – Hi, it was nice to meet you!

A bunch of us headed over to a restaurant afterwards and I had the pleasure of being seated next to Mamacate, Kat with a K (and her killer red shoes), and Amysue, whom I have never met. I’ve never gotten to spend much time with this particular array of ladies and I was so glad I did. Funny, brilliant, charming women, one and all. And Amysue was carrying a bag she’d made from this awesome fabric festooned with busy 1950’s ladies doing busy 1950’s ladies things in a busy 1950’s kitchen. Seriously, there were at least eight women in that one kitchen, doing everything from getting peas out of the freezer to decorating a wedding cake! Of course, I was partial to the one twirling around aimlessly with a chocolate cake. All were properly attired in full skirts and heels. This makes me love Amysue instantly.

I also left last night with a Finished Object! I made a visor from Bud cans. Carole’s brilliant husband, Dale, came up with the perfect name for it. A Budvisor! HA! I hope I didn’t offend anyone at the table by whipping out the trifecta of kitsch – Red heart yarn, a crochet hook, and pieces of beer can with holes punched in them! I’m still tweaking it a bit, but the pattern for that should be up soon. As Jackie noted, it would be perfect on the golf course.

I had a great time seeing everyone yesterday. Thanks for all the kind words and congratulations about the book, both in person and in comments. As dorky as it sounds, I really did do it for you guys.

 

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Welcome!!

Published on 17 Apr 2006 at 9:08 pm. 4 Comments.
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Welcome to my brand new swingin’ pad! It’s much roomier, and there’s lots to see! But first, what’s all this about a book?!

It’s true, the Museum of Kitschy Stitches has been captured on paper in a book subtitled “A Gallery of Notorious Knits”. And there’s no lack of crochet in there, either. It’s being published by Quirk Books and should be out mid-late summer of this year. You’re going to love it! The people I worked with were amazing and understood my goofy vision immediately. I’ll spill more details in the coming days.

I’m really excited and it’s been killing me not to say anything. But that’s a large part of the reason I’ve been not such a good blogger. It’s really time-consuming to make a book. It’s also why you haven’t seen an edition of the MOKS in a while. From now on, I’ll be posting every day during the week (I’m giving myself weekends off). I’m hoping to strike a balance between the way it used to be, with a continuing theme for exhibits, and also tossing in random items from out in left field. We’ll see how it goes.

I’ve also created a new feature called Tin Can Alley. My brother was kind enough to do some modeling for me, as you’ll soon see. I created the gallery because almost every time I check my stats, someone has found me by searching for “beer can hat” or “aluminum can crochet”. I’m not exactly sure why, but I figured I’d give the people what they wanted. More patterns are on the way!

The page of links is still being put together, so it’s definitely a work-in-progress. I also added a gallery of finished objects for your perusal. There’s a space where you can sign up to receive updates on the book and website. It’s not going to be an announcement of every post, it will just allow me to get the occasional word out about book details, fun additions to the website and upcoming contests for people who want to be in the know. There’s also a link on each post so you can easily email them to your friends who are bored at work! Neat!

We’ll be tweaking the site when we notice little things here and there, but I’m over the moon with the way it came out. The site was done by a great designer named Cynthia Malaran. She totally rocked the house! I tried to do it myself a while ago and it was a total nightmare. I bow to her.

Enjoy! MOKS posts will start tomorrow!

 

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Beware – This is the End of the Line for Cuteness

Published on 10 Apr 2006 at 5:29 pm. 17 Comments.
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Are you sure you want to look? I mean, emotionally, are you ready to see the cutest thing you will EVER see? You might as well poke your eyes out after this, because there is simply no way for anything to even parallel it in cuteness, never mind surpass it. And yes, I admit it, I am just enamored with the inter-species love-in that seems to be going around the globe lately. (I’m going to regret using those words in that order as soon as Google sees them, I just know it.) This time, it comes to us from Malaysia.

You sure you want to see it? Once you see, you cannot unsee.

Last chance, folks.

Ok, you seem pretty determined. Here is the cutest freaking thing EVER.

Don’t blame me if you get despondent because you’ve been to the top of Cute Mountain and there’s nowhere to go but down, smacking your head on every rock that’s just not quite as cute.

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Thanks to Cute Overload for the link, and to the original photographer, Kazzie*, for taking them. In her comments about the photos, she says that she spent an hour just hanging out with these two and the kitten was purring like crazy. Seriously, what more is there after this? I’m just an empty shell now that I’ve attained Cute Nirvana. I have achieved supreme encutenment, I’m ready to move on to the next level of existence. No, wait, Owen and Mzee are still out there! I can’t leave yet.

In knitting news, almost done the Clapotis scarf. I would have finished, but I lost the piece of paper that had the pattern on it and I didn’t know how the last 12 or so rows go. Argh! Soon it’ll be off to Iowa. Hopefully it’s still a little chilly there.

In other news, Melanie is still in the hospital but doing ok. They’re still fiddling with her innards, but things aren’t as dire as they were a few days ago. Hopefully they’ll fix her up for good this time and she’ll be home in a couple of days. Cross any and all appendages available to you for luck. I printed out all the comments left for her with me and on her blog and she was so touched at the outpouring of support and good wishes. She sends her love. Now, give me some good blog gossip (real or fake) to give her. :)

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It’s time for a Melanie update

Published on 6 Apr 2006 at 1:41 pm. 15 Comments.
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I just spoke to Melanie and she sends her love to the interweb. Unfortunately, she is back in the hospital. She’s having some pretty serious post-pregnancy complications. She’s feeling fine right now and is being monitored closely. She has selected me as her Official Spokesperson. I wonder if I get a cool blazer with a badge that says “Melanie Action News Team – From her Uterus to You”. She wanted me to post an update since she won’t be able to do it over at her blog for at least a few days.

Here’s what’s been happening:

Last week, Melanie was admitted to the hospital with a very high fever. It was 104 degrees when she went to the hospital and topped off at a little over 106 a short time later. With Hydration IVs and a long sponge bath by her husband (unfortunately, not as sexy as it seems), it came down. It turned out that she had a massive infection from retained placenta left over from the second placenta she delivered. They didn’t diagnose this immediately because she wasn’t having any other symptoms besides the fever. There was none of the pain normally associated with it. She was given a D&C and had to stay in the hospital for a couple of days to be sure the infection was managed properly and that she was free of fever for a set number of hours. They found two types of common bacteria and were confident that the antibiotics would take care of them. She was sent home, feeling healthy and well.

Yesterday, she started to have some heavy bleeding. Enough that it freaked her out and made her call an ambulance. She went to the hospital, they checked her out, the bleeding stopped and I guess they chalked it up to being a result of the D&C. She wasn’t having any pain (again) or any other symptoms, so home she went. And then the floodgates opened. Like the elevator in The Shining, she was gushing blood at an alarming rate and took her second ambulance ride within a few hours of the last. She said the amount of blood was so much worse, that by comparison, she could have leisurely strolled to the hospital earlier that day. The had to transfuse her with 4 units of blood, gave her another D&C, and ended up removing a blood clot the size of a football.

Clearly, something is very wrong with our Ms. Melanie.

The doctors seem perplexed and have stopped sounding so sure that this is all due to retained placenta. But maybe it is. There is talk of this ordeal ending with a partial hysterectomy, so on the scale of deals, this is a Big one. But Melanie is very pragmatic when it comes to things like this and she’s not too traumatized at the thought of the partial hysterectomy. She said that it wouldn’t change her future plans too much because she didn’t want any more that two kids before, and she certainly doesn’t want more now. So while it’s not a great solution, if it happens, she’s ready to deal with it. She’s not looking forward to the recovery it will require, but at some point, it may be the only way to stop all this craziness.

When I last spoke to her, she seemed frustrated and tired, but still as sweet as ever. She’s as comfortable as you can be lying in a hospital bed while wearing a gigantic pad, not in any pain, and is wearing her badge of Medical Mystery with extreme grace. For the time being, the bleeding has stopped. Her mother and mother-in-law are now helping Dean at home with the babes, who are doing very well but miss their mum. She asked me to thank everyone for their well wishes and the many gifts she’s received. But she also wanted me to ask people not to send her more stuff because they don’t really have room for it in their little apartment, and I also think she feels a little badly that she’s not able to thank people the way she’d like to for all their kindness. But mostly, with one husband, two babies, and three mothers, there’s just not a whole lot of space. What she does love more than anything are emails and well-wishes on her blog. Now that her computer is up and running, she can access them and it really makes her smile to see the love in her Inbox or comments section. She said that through this whole thing, she can’t stop writing blog posts in her mind about it all. She’s a blogging champ!

When I know more about her condition or anything else she wants me to tell you about (maybe a really cute doctor for one you single folks . . .) I’ll let you know. She’s trying to stay on the down-low for this hospital trip, I really think it’s starting to wear on her and she just wants to chill out, so she asked that no one call her until she’s feeling more up to it. But by all means, send all the good vibes you can muster her way. She really appreciates all the support she gets from our amazing community here in blogland.

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